Landed in the Sandpit

Landed into the heat on Thursday night late at about 11pm. After a visit to the bar with a friend I got to my company apartment at 1:30am. Couldn't get to sleep until 3am, partly because I was / am in a single bed!

My mind was racing with a million thoughts, ranging from instantly missing people to being excited and not wanting to sleep. I spent the weekend out in the sun, drinking, catching up wtih friends and enjoying myself before starting work yesterday.

Now, it's just back to reality. This office might be bigger than the last and full of different people but I can't see the window that shows off Dubai. I may as well be in a bunker in Bradford. That I can live with, it's the little Dubai nuances that I struggle to grasp with the variety of nationalities and levels of spoken English. I don't expect perfect English from everyone because frankly, it's harsh to expect that when my Arabic is minimal...but if I just keep saying 'Yes' to everything I don't understand then I'm going to end up in trouble.

When Reality Attacks

The idea of this blog was not initially to just rant, but I have been doing that in a few of the posts, so this one is not going down that stream.

Reality has hit in the last few days about moving to Dubai, further down you can see my list of things to do that I hope some of you have found helpful. I had an amazing leaving party and night out with a good bunch of friends on Saturday night, more people came and made the effort than I could have asked for and it's a nice feeling to have.

In the whirlwind of sorting and moving and packing and signing and researching and reading and paying for your life changing decision to move to Dubai (or anywhere overseas) you rarely will allow yourself time to let the emotional thoughts creep in. I've certainly not let it happen until the last few days. Things are a bit calmer now and just a case of seeing out my last few days at work, packing up my room and shifting stuff home to Mum before I fly next week.

The urge to chuck things out is huge but I can't. I've found so many things that if I were to stay overseas for the rest of my life, would be wasted in the old dear's garage, but I can't throw them away. Is it because I'm hoping that one day I'll be back in the UK to live and work? Is it because I secretly haven't accepted that I'm moving yet? Do I actually deep down not want to go?

I spoke to my Dad who retired overseas and knows me as well as anyone could. He suggested that perhaps I'm adept at preparing for something that I know and understand, I know how to deal with an issue if it's small or I've had it before. Perhaps I'm all over the shop inside because I really don't know what to expect from living and working in Dubai.

Reality is attacking me this week that I'm venturing into such an unknown and I will be doing this alone. Sure family are a phone call away but it's a day travelling if I desperately wanted to get home. I think the best option is to suck it and see, but making sure I'm taking a high dose of Man-the-F**k-Up Pills between now and when I'm settled.

Old Women are all evil.

This is a fact.

I am finishing my last few days of work in the Hampshire coastal town of Lymington. For those of you who know the place, please bear with me, for those of you who don't I shall explain. It is a Conservative stronghold, probably never been anything but Blue, the population is much older and it would be a lovely place in the New Forest to retire to. Opposite the office I'm in is the red brick, iron gated, ivy clad Lymington Conservative Club, that about sums up this place, very middle / upper class.

I've got no problem with that, but being a young man working here and buying my lunch everyday in Marks and Spencer's I get some funny responses. I'm not short at 6ft2 and I'm reasonably well built at best part of 17stone, but, that doesn't mean I'm a threat. Nor does the fact that to work I'm often not out meeting people so wear jeans, t-shirt or jumper and a cap.

I've been brought up to respect the elders and be a polite person, I always let the little old dear and their husbands through doors before me, and try not to walk too closely behind any of them because last thing they want to turn around and see is me. But this does not stop the looks I receive.

I can't begin to tell you the amount of times I've let an old lady through the door towards me first and stood well out her way with a big smile on my face, only to be looked at as though I've spat on her and kicked her in the shins. Sometimes I wish I had done that.

My point is, that appearances can be stellar, and deceiving. I'm a polite, well brought up lad and perhaps if I wore a suit everyday to the office and therefore the shops I wouldn't ever receive these thunderous scowls. I don't know why it bothers me so much but I don't like to be judged on what I'm wearing or how clean shaven I am on a particular day. I'm not threatening, I'm smiling.

When I'm 80 (if I make it) I'll smile at everyone still.

My move to Dubai. In one list.

For those of you, like me who have scoured the web only to find guides that relate to the classic 2.4 children situation I thought I would give my slant on things. Firstly though, to understand I am a 23 (just) year old guy with no kids, I rent a house with a mate off another friend and have a garage at Mother's to be able to store stuff, but not too much or I get an earful. I've taken the tact of selling most things, taking only what I need.

Firstly, Sell;

• Car - Autotrader, Gumtree, Advert in car window, Facebook/Twitter link the adverts too
• TV's - I raised best part of £400 by selling my two flatscreens; one on eBay, one to Granny
• Surfboard - Alright, most people won't have one to sell but got me some more cash, sold on eBay
• Bed - Through a friend on Facebook
• Sofa - Yet to sell, will stick on eBay
• Sell anything big, you can always buy it again unless you are planning on coming back to it in 6 months.

Addresses;

• Bank
• Credit Card
• Mobile
• Any others that need to know.

Utilities / Stuff;

• Notify Gas - Easy.
• Electric - Easy.
• Mobile provider - iPhone tariff can only be dropped one level and that's it. Just keep a diary of when you need to cancel it permanently, or pay it off...
• Council Tax - Easy peasy.
• TV License - You initially sign up for a year but with proof you can reclaim / cancel it.
• Car Insurance - Easy to call and say you are leaving if paying monthly like me, but they charge for cancelling and charge to end the DD instruction. Fascists.
• LoveFILM or anything like that, don't forget to cancel them.

Things to set up;

• Offshore bank account - I've gone with my UK bank supplier but there are plenty, just be wary of charges that are linked if you don't have £25,000+ to put in it. 
• Make sure you let HMRC know, you want the P85, can print it online and get a guide to take you through it. Really easy, just fill out and send off. 
• Join Airmiles clubs, Emirates Skywards and Virgin are two I've signed up for, worth doing to collect the prizes like upgrades.
• Get an International Driving Permit (IDP), Post Office do these for £5.50 and takes 5 minutes, on their website they tell you what you need.

Packing;

• I'm only taking clothes that I need.
• DVD's in a wallet thing (save space)
• Golf Clubs - Virgin and Emirates let you take a set for free, so take full advantage.

To be honest, all of the above is what I've done, the bits I'm planning to sort as soon as I can when I am in Dubai are as follows;

• I've been told to just tell immigration that you are there for a holiday visiting friends, if you say you are moving...they will search everything you have brought. A family friend had her copy of Mamma Mia taken off her because it "wasn't suitable". Just say 'holiday' and smile.
• Alcohol License - Believe you can pick up from a couple of supermarkets, will update when i've done it.
• Buy a Sim Card at the airport if you aren't being given a mobile very quickly. I spent £600 on my phone in a 4 day trip last year.
• Visa, your company will help with this but you just need a medical and then to get it processed I believe.
• Set up a bank account
• Rent a car? Use your IDP if needs be, some say you need it some say you don't.
• Have a beer and chill the fudge out.

I hope this provides some use to people looking to move to Dubai who are in a similar position to me. It is quite daunting but this list is not that long. It's simple really; Sell the big stuff, move the rest to Mum's, Pack the clothes, DVD's and golf clubs that you'll need, Let a few people know and get on the plane...easy.

Fingers crossed anyway.

I want to wear a dress to work.

I've worked in a few different offices, but one of the first is the office that stands out. Horrible old 70's concrete box, crap metal 'sash' windows which were mirrored to cleverly allow all heat in and none out. 

There was no air conditioning to speak of, or heating for that matter and in the UK it's nice to be kept warm or cool depending on whatever the Gulf Stream fancies doing.

Few years back, very hot summer, but I'm still expected (and secretly enjoy) to wear a suit, shirt and tie to work. No problems with that, I'll take the heat on the chin and deal with it. But why on earth do these simple rules of dress code not apply to women? The number of times colleagues (female) would come in wearing a summer dress and flip-fucking-flops was untrue. "But I still look and feel smart", no, you look like you should with a group of students playing frisbee in a park with a disposable BBQ. Now go back home and come back in something suitable.

Equal rights my arse.

Foray into the Unknown

Ladies and Gents.


No-one and I mean no-one is likely to read this. I'm not a celebrity or a star or a sporting hero. I'm a slightly overweight, 23 year old lad moving to Dubai in about 3 weeks, I want somewhere to write what I'm thinking and tell people who are interested what I think the place is like.


I've spent too much time reading what other people have to say, I want to say what annoys me about the place, or how stupid some of the red tape is. I want to live MY Dubai 'Dream'. Starting....now.


The amount of stuff to sort in the UK is stupid, but I think I've done it, except for paying any bills recently. Oh, and selling my car. Who knew that was such a ball-ache. Its a lovely Audi, only 5 years old, I've kept him well (he is called Alfie) and he has never failed me. Why won't someone buy him? Perhaps it's because the coalition dictatorship government want to increase fuel duty by 3p. How can they justify that? Perhaps it's because it has done over 90,000 miles, but let's face it - Audi's can. Perhaps it's because it's blue. I really don't know. All I want to happen is someone to phone or text and be interested. No, not David Osburne who was a scammer (I found this out after seeing it on a website from Australia). Someone real please, show your face and buy my car.


I guess what I'm getting at is that, despite concluding 90% of my list of 'shit to do' before flying to Dubai and feeling very much in control of it all with my colour coded spreadsheet...there is just so much that you actually have zero control over. I can put everything in place to move out there but might get a visa turned down, or I might not sell my car and have to keep paying it off for no reason whatsoever. These things are all quite a big deal in my world, and I have no control or real influence.


Quite a scary thought when they are the bigger issues right now.